Saturday, December 30, 2006

Truth or Fiction

I saw him from a distance....He knew I was coming. Was it his heart that ran in temptation,,,or was it mine. Did he linger longer for a reason,,or did I prolong the visit for a reason of my own...He leaned forward and kissed me..a sweet gentle kiss ...but yet enough to let me know how he feels,,he hugged me..enough for all the sorrows of the past and present to fade away...Today was like that kind of day for me--Out on the road delivering the mail,,and going threw one fantasy or another,,,some were more better than others,,,where I have to deliver a certified and am held captive by this creature from yet another planet,,,or I will drift off thinking how I want my house built on a certain piece of parcel that catches my eye. And I will go threw the whole floor plan in my head,,,right down to how I want the landscape to look,,,and how nice the shape of my pool fits well together among the shrubs and jacuzzi. I took along my camera on a day like today,,,my mood was set on mellow--the air was crisp,,and was sorta a cloudy type of day,,,where you wondered if it was going to break out in a snow squall,,,or was the sun going to win on this day. I saw people raking their yards,,,and mothers pushing kids on swings,,,they were so bundled up they reminded me of very short fat snowmen. The 30th of December in the year or 2006,,,and people were enjoying the outdoors like a fall type of day. No snow to play in plow or shovel---The weather is getting very weird for the North East. I completed another tour of my duty doing the mail.( The picture was takin today on mail route,,,I just love the way the vine and wheel have learned to live together in harmony and create something so pretty.) Was planning on enjoying my next 2 days off for just me--and things I wanted to do--{as J would say,,I always do what I want to do},,,,Well I got home and knowing earlier in the day,,,there was going to be a mass for his Dad. So I had to go even thou I never met him,,,{J} was 10 when he died. I thought I met him in a dream many years ago like 20 years,,,when he came to me and said.....I don't actually remember what,,,but is was something about I should not stay with {J},he is very stubborn and totally different from you. ,,I told {J} and his mom about the dream back then,,,I think they laughed,,perhaps I did do,,,but I remember bits and pieces of that as if it was real. Mass was at 10am,,,I asked {J},,,your Mom is not planning a brunch/lunch/or get together after wards,,,,I have plans--As he pulls the rug from under me and says yes we are going to Breakfast too. I have to work at 2pm,,,visit my Mom,,do laundry,,shop,,,and go to the gym all between church and work---I have no time to sit back and wait at a restaurant that will be busy for something I don't even feel like eating at that hour. {Me ordering-,,,Do you have low fat yogurt--Waiter--No man....Ok,,regular yogurt,,,him yes,,,Good I would like that with 2 tablespoons of flax seed and a 1/4 cup of blueberries or raspberries---fresh not frozen} Ugh,,,I don't want to do this,,,to late to fake I am sick,,,,or is it? I will go to Church- and restaurant,,,and just get coffee,,when the clock strikes 11;30 i am out of there. If he worked 7 days week he would understand this. I will slow down when I am rich----Happy Trails-------------

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