Morning has just begun,,unlike in this picture which held a promise of a great day. Today it is fall,,actually we are still into summer it just feels like fall. There is a steady rain falling on the pond. A gentle breeze that brings the mist to your face. Today I am heading down to the post office for a BBQ,,,at 10 in the morning. Now ask your self who has a award BBQ at that hour of the morning,,,you might think it is a breakfast BBQ,,,,no--it is a hamburger,,,hot dog salad type of deal. I usually do not eat till 1pm,,or later,,,so not sure what I will partake in...The only fruit there will be the apples I bring. And to me at 10 am,,,a apple is the perfect food. Actually any fruit or yogurt at that hour. I ave been having problems posting a pic on this new and improved site...so I sent a help signal out and blogger came threw,,,If any one has a problem posting a pic try these few little steps----1] delete your cache & cookies...(located in your Internet Options)....2} unplug any plug ins---I had my wireless mouse in and my camera...It seemed to have work. My patient has fallen back to sleep, and time has crept up on me fast,,,need to get in the shower and head to the BBQ,,,,Happy Trails!!!!!!!##########################################
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is"VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE."3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a"LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THEINFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a"PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets"CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED." 8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is"MEDICALLY ENHANCED."9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED."11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is "PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLYCORRECT:1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers"GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes"ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of"RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE EMPATHY."9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" -He is "RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED."(ooohhhhh, is THAT what you call that??!!!!!)10. He is not "HORNY" -He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of hispants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE."############################## Ole and Lena were out walking and Lena clutched her heart and fell to >the sidewalk. Ole got out his cell phone and called 9-1-1.> The Operator said "Where are you?"> Ole answered, "We were walking and Lena is on the sidewalk on >Eucalyptus Street."> The operator asked, "How do you spell that?"> The phone seemed to go dead. The operator kept shouting for Ole. She >could hear him panting. He finally came back on line and said, "I dragged >her over to Oak Street, that's O-A-K.">> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Two Norwegian hunters from >Minnesota got a pilot to fly them to Canada to hunt moose. They bagged six. >As they started loading the plane for the return trip, the pilot said the >plane could take only four moose. The two lads objected strongly, "Last >year we shot six and the pilot let us put> them all on board and he had the same plane as yours."> Reluctantly, the pilot gave in and all six were loaded. However, even >on full power, the little plane couldn't handle the load and went down a >few moments after takeoff.> Climbing out of the wreck one Norski asked the other, "Any idea where >we are?"> "Yaaah, I tink we's pretty close to where we crashed last year."> ------------ ------------------------------------------------ Lena >called the airlines information desk and inquired, "How long does it take >to fly from Minneapolis to Fargo?"> "Yust a minute," said the busy clerk.> "Vell," said Lena, "if it has to go dat fast, I tink I'll yust take da >bus."> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> The judge had just awarded a divorce to Lena, who had charged >nonsupport. He said to Ole, "I have decided to give your wife $400 a month> for support."> "Vell, dat's fine, Judge," smiled Ole. "And vunce in a while I'll try >to chip in a few bucks, myself."> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Lars, the bartender, asked Ole, "Do ya know da difference between a >Norwegian and a canoe?"> "No, I don't," answered Ole.> "A canoe will sometimes tip," explained Lars.> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Ole is so cheap that after his airplane landed safely he grumbled, >"Vell, Deere gose five dollars down da drain for dat flight insurance!"> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Lars: "Ole, stant in front of my car and tell me if da turn signals >are working."> Ole: "Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No.."> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Ole and Lena got married. On their honeymoon trip they were nearing >Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena's knee.> Giggling, Lena said, Ole, you can go a little farther now if ya vant >to."> So Ole drove to Duluth> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Ole died. So Lena went to the local paper to put a notice in the >obituaries. The gentleman at the counter, after offering his condolences,> asked Lena what she would like to say about Ole.> Lena replied, "You yust put 'Ole died.'"> The gentleman, somewhat perplexed, asked, "That's it? Just 'Ole >died?'" Surely, there must be something more you'd like to say about Ole. >If it's money you're concerned about, the first five words are free. We >must say something more."> So Lena pondered for a few minutes and finally said, "O.K. You put, >Ole died. Boat for sale"> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Ole and Lars were on their very first train ride. They had brought >along bananas for lunch. Just as they began to peel them, the train entered >a> long, dark tunnel.> "Have you eaten your banana yet?" Ole asked excitedly.> "No," replied Lars.> "Vell, don't touch it den," Ole exclaimed, "I yust took vun bite and >vent blind!"> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is"VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE."3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a"LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THEINFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a"PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets"CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED." 8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is"MEDICALLY ENHANCED."9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED."11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is "PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLYCORRECT:1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers"GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes"ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of"RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE EMPATHY."9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" -He is "RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED."(ooohhhhh, is THAT what you call that??!!!!!)10. He is not "HORNY" -He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of hispants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE."############################## Ole and Lena were out walking and Lena clutched her heart and fell to >the sidewalk. Ole got out his cell phone and called 9-1-1.> The Operator said "Where are you?"> Ole answered, "We were walking and Lena is on the sidewalk on >Eucalyptus Street."> The operator asked, "How do you spell that?"> The phone seemed to go dead. The operator kept shouting for Ole. She >could hear him panting. He finally came back on line and said, "I dragged >her over to Oak Street, that's O-A-K.">> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Two Norwegian hunters from >Minnesota got a pilot to fly them to Canada to hunt moose. They bagged six. >As they started loading the plane for the return trip, the pilot said the >plane could take only four moose. The two lads objected strongly, "Last >year we shot six and the pilot let us put> them all on board and he had the same plane as yours."> Reluctantly, the pilot gave in and all six were loaded. However, even >on full power, the little plane couldn't handle the load and went down a >few moments after takeoff.> Climbing out of the wreck one Norski asked the other, "Any idea where >we are?"> "Yaaah, I tink we's pretty close to where we crashed last year."> ------------ ------------------------------------------------ Lena >called the airlines information desk and inquired, "How long does it take >to fly from Minneapolis to Fargo?"> "Yust a minute," said the busy clerk.> "Vell," said Lena, "if it has to go dat fast, I tink I'll yust take da >bus."> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> The judge had just awarded a divorce to Lena, who had charged >nonsupport. He said to Ole, "I have decided to give your wife $400 a month> for support."> "Vell, dat's fine, Judge," smiled Ole. "And vunce in a while I'll try >to chip in a few bucks, myself."> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Lars, the bartender, asked Ole, "Do ya know da difference between a >Norwegian and a canoe?"> "No, I don't," answered Ole.> "A canoe will sometimes tip," explained Lars.> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Ole is so cheap that after his airplane landed safely he grumbled, >"Vell, Deere gose five dollars down da drain for dat flight insurance!"> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Lars: "Ole, stant in front of my car and tell me if da turn signals >are working."> Ole: "Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No.."> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Ole and Lena got married. On their honeymoon trip they were nearing >Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena's knee.> Giggling, Lena said, Ole, you can go a little farther now if ya vant >to."> So Ole drove to Duluth> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Ole died. So Lena went to the local paper to put a notice in the >obituaries. The gentleman at the counter, after offering his condolences,> asked Lena what she would like to say about Ole.> Lena replied, "You yust put 'Ole died.'"> The gentleman, somewhat perplexed, asked, "That's it? Just 'Ole >died?'" Surely, there must be something more you'd like to say about Ole. >If it's money you're concerned about, the first five words are free. We >must say something more."> So Lena pondered for a few minutes and finally said, "O.K. You put, >Ole died. Boat for sale"> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~> Ole and Lars were on their very first train ride. They had brought >along bananas for lunch. Just as they began to peel them, the train entered >a> long, dark tunnel.> "Have you eaten your banana yet?" Ole asked excitedly.> "No," replied Lars.> "Vell, don't touch it den," Ole exclaimed, "I yust took vun bite and >vent blind!"> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>
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