Thursday, April 10, 2008
Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
1}Mohammed Aldouri (Iraqi ambassador): The chicken did not cross the road। This is a complete fabrication. We don't even have a chicken.
२}Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.
३}George W। Bush: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.
४}Bill Clinton: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken। What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?
५}Howard Cosell: It may very well have been one of the most astonishing events to grace the annals of history. An historic, unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt such an herculean achievement formerly relegated to homo sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurence.
६}Darwin: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically dispositioned to cross roads.
७}Jacques Derrida: Any number of contending discourses may be discovered within the act of the chicken crossing the road, and each interpretation is equally valid as the authorial intent can never be discerned,because structuralism is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!
८}Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
९}Emerson: The chicken didn't cross the road; it transcended it.
१०}Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.
११}Louis Farrakhan: The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken "crossed" the black man in order to trample him and keep him down.
१२}Freud: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
१३}Bill Gates: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.
बोनुस:
Grandpa: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken had crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
Thursday, April 03, 2008
My 13 Thursday List
2} Encyelopedia Of Creative Cooking 3} Readers Digest: Creative Cooking 4} Rachael Ray's Open House Cookbook 5} Fireside Cookbook { one of my favorites} 6} Harmony In The Kitchen: Trumball High School 7} Taste Of Home { hard copies, numerous year 1997-2002 8} The Ultimate Southern Living 9} The 20th Anniversary of Southern Living 10} Our Best Home cooking { Boyscout troop 102} 11} Gourmet Menu's For Contemporary Cooking 12} The Lady and Son's Too: Paula H. Deen 13} McCall's Cookie Collection Even now with the Internet, I stll keep these and numerous other ones The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants |
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Thirteen Items From Adult Party
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Thursday, March 20, 2008
Thursday Thirteen My List # 32
........................... 1}Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world. crops and livestock. year in Mexifornia and Florexico. screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2030. Buenas Noches (Good Night...Press 2 for English) |
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Thursday, March 06, 2008
Thirteen Things To Make You Giggle
3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG? (they don't stop to ask directions) 4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS? (because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapor lock) (You're laughing, aren't you?!?!) 5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS? (so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties) 6. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH? (because a vibrator can't mow the lawn) Now if that just made the ladies giggle the next 6 will make the men laugh, ok some might giggle :>) ..Top 6 reasons a gun is favored over a woman.... 7. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22. 8. If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out a few times. 9. Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo. 10. Guns function normally every day of the month. 11. A gun doesn't ask , "Do these new grips make me look fat?" 12. A gun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it. 13. YOU CAN BUY A SILENCER |
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Thursday, February 28, 2008
My TT List
1} Be sure to refill the ice trays 2} Don't forget to wind the clock before you go to bed. 3} Wash your feet before you go to bed, they are nasty from playing outside all day barefooted. { Now even on the beach, I hesitate to take my sandles off.} 4} You have torn the knees out of that pair of pants so many times there is nothing left to put a patch on. { And now for $50, you can buy them like that} 5} Don't you go outside with your good school clothes on! { I wouldn't leave the house if I didn't have Good cloth's on} 6 } Be sure and pour the cream off the top of the milk when you open the new bottle. { To me this sounds cool} 7} Let me know when the Fuller Brush man comes by, I need to get a few things from him. { Door to door salesmen....Wish they still came} 8} You boys stay close by, the car may not start and I will need you to help push it off.{ Poor Kids} 9} There's a dollar in my purse, get 5 gallons of gas when you go to town. {In Oslo, Norway gas is $6.82 cents, In Venezuela it is .12cents a gallon} 10} Here, take this old magazine to the toilet with you when you go, we are almost out of paper out there. { Thank God times have changed, but when I was growing up I remember this.} 11} Go out to the well and draw a bucket of water so I can wash dishes. { Many times I had to carry water, I remember being 5 and caring the water before school, the bus came and I hid so the other kids would not see me, LOL , I had the day off school that day.} 12} I don't have nine cents for you to go to the show. Do you think money grows on trees? { Now days it's over $6. to go.} 13} If you get a spanking in school and I find out about it, You will get another one when you get home! { Yikes, nowadays that's abuse}
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Thursday, February 21, 2008
My Thirteen Thursday List
Here's a little quiz to see how much you remember about some less-than-important things from a few decades back. It's just for fun, no scoring involved. Even the wrong answers may bring back a memory or two. Have Fun!
1. What builds strong bodies 12 ways?
A. Flintstones vitamins
B. The buttmaster
C. Spaghetti
D. Wonder Bread
E. Orange Juice
F. Milk G. Cod Liver Oil
2. Before he was Muhammed Ali, he was...
A. Sugar Ray Robinson
B. Roy Orbison
C. Gene Autry
D. Rudolph Valentino
E. Fabian
F. Mickey Mantle
G. Cassius Clay
3. Pogo, the comic strip charac ter said, 'We have met the enemy and...
A. It's you
B. He is us
C. It's the Grinch
D. He wasn't home
E. He's really mean
F. We quit
G. He surrendered
4. Good night, David.
A. Good night, Chet
B. Sleep well
C. Good Night, Irene
D. Good Night, Gracie
E. See you later, alligator
F. Until tomorrow
G. Good night, Steve
5. You'll wonder where the yellow went,
A. When you use Tide
B. When you lose your crayons
C. When you clean your tub
D. If you paint the room blue
E. If you buy a soft water tank
F. When you use Lady Clairol
G. When you brush your teeth with Pepsodent
6. Before he was the Skipper's Little Buddy, Bob Denver was Dobie's friend,
A. Stuart Whitman
B. Randolph Scott
C. Steve Reeves
D. Maynard
G. Krebbs
E. Corky B. Dork
F. Dave the Whale
G. Zippy Zoo
7. Liar, liar...
A. You're a liar
B. Your nose is growing
C. Pants on fire
D. Join the choir
E. Jump up higher
F. On the wire
G. I'm telling Mom
8. Meanwhile, back in Metropolis, Superman fights a never ending battle for truth, justice and...
A. Wheaties
B. Lois Lane
C. TV ratings
D. World peace
E. Red tights
F. The American way
G. News headlines
9 . Hey, kids, what time is it?
A. It's time for Yogi Bear
B. It's time to do your homework
C. It's Howdy Doody Time
D. It's Time for Romper Room
E. It's bedtime
F. The Mighty Mouse Hour
G. Scoopy Doo Time
10. Lions and tigers and bears...
A. Yikes
B. Oh no
C. Gee whiz
D. I'm scared
E. Oh My
F. Help Help
G. Let's run
11.Bob Dylan advised us never to trust anyone
A. Over 40
B. Wearing a uniform
C. Carrying a briefcase
D. Over 30
E. You don't know
F. Who says, 'Trust me'
G. Who eats tofu
12. NFL quarterback who appeared in a television commercial wearing women's stockings.
A. Troy Aikman
B. Kenny Stabler
C. Joe Namath
D. Roger Stauback
E. Joe Montana
F. Steve Young
G. John Elway
13. Brylcream...
A. Smear it on
B. You'll smell great
C. Tame that cowlick
D. Greaseball hea ven
E. It's a dream
F. We're your team
G. A little dab'll do ya
Okay, now scroll down for the answers!
1 d - Wonder Bread 2 g - Cassius Clay 3 b - He Is Us
4 a - Good night, Chet 5 g - When you brush your teeth with Pepsodent 6 d - Maynard G. Krebbs 7 c - Pants On Fire
8 f - The American Way 9 c - It's Howdy Doody Time 10 e - Oh My 11 d - Over 30 12 c - Joe Namath 13 g - A l ittle dab'll do ya
Thursday, February 14, 2008
My Thirteen Thursday List
(The first part of the list is for the Women, The last 6 is for the Men) member to stay, and take her away for the night. 3} Also you might clean the house for her, and cook her favorite meal. 4} Rent a teary love story,and watch together. 5} If she is working surprize her with a flower arangement. 6} Draw her a bath with scented salts, and scatter rose pettles in it. As she is soaking bring her a glass of wine and offer to scrub her back. 7} Present her with a surpize cruise that you leave on in 2 hours. All arangements have been made to have the time worry free. The Men's List 8} Do a lap dance for him when he least expects it. 9} If he is in the shower, join him and offer to help. 10} Cook his favorite meal. 11} Help him find the remote control, and give him extra batteries. 12} Invite a bunch of his buddies over to watch a game with him. { Your reward shall come later} 13} Undo the phone so no one calls....send the inlaws away if they come over, and give him a full body massage. Happy Valentines Day,...May there be love in your heart, and your day perfect!!
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Thursday, February 07, 2008
My Thirteen Thursday List
2} Yahoo, E-mail = Blogger Review's,& Spam 3} Bskaad, blog= My favorite blog, from Norway. 4} Bloody Mary Ghost Storie= Went there from watching Ghost Whispers, interesting. 5} The School Bus Driver= A favorite blog I like to read, and a #1 player on Situation Sunday. And a mother of a very smart beautful child.
6} Enjoying The Ride= Another favorite blog, a crafty funny lady, and mother of 3 beautiful children. 7} Midgies Blog= My little sister, and a unbelievable mother of 4 beautiful children, how she juggles like,kids,family is amazing. 8} Modular Home Sales= Need to prepare for when I win the lottery! 9} Walmart Free Samples= A great site to get things in the mail, for free! 10} Verizon E-mail= My email from friends and family 11} Joox.net=A place I found surfing that you can watch free movies 12} NetFlex movies= I just signed up, and I love it! 13} Facebook= Something else I am trying. |
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Thursday, January 31, 2008
My Thirteen Thursday List
1} That I awoke today! 2} My Family 3} My Friends 4} That Lost was on last night. 5} That I can watch it again tonight, with out falling asleep at the end. 6} That I am loved 7} For my past, and all the lesson's I have learned. 8} That I can afford the price of gas. 9} A job that pays good, and I like. 10} The right to choose, in what ever I wish. 11} The smell of Irish spring soap. 12} That {J} has been cooking supper lately. 13} That I now have DSL {High Speed, internet} |
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Thursday, January 24, 2008
Thirteen Thursday & Spices
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Thursday, January 10, 2008
My Thirteen Thursday List
2.} There will be a mail count in February,Then will I get the route? 3.} How will I handle a 5 day work week? 4.} I bought 2 bedspreads for the spare roommy office,which one shall I use? The fuchsia color,or the beige Chenille. 5.} I need a new rug, for the office room, but I hesitate buying it thinking I will win the lottery and need to furnish a whole house soon. 6.} I will be hanging out with my nephews this week end. My God sons...What movies shall we watch...Any suggestions? {16 & 14 year old's.} 7.} Has any one tried Natural Advantage? And did it work? 8.} Hillery or the other guy? 9.} Count school is coming up...Ugh...Which one shall I go to? 10.} Will more people play Situation Sunday? 11.} Will I get any cross country skiing in this year? 12.} Shall I see a bear this year? 13.} Where shall our first camping trip be?...{ Hopefully not near the bear} |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Thursday, January 03, 2008
2} I want to pay off my charge cards. 3} Lower my Triglycerides, {less red meat} 4} Eat more fish, and fresh veggies 5} Loose about 20lbs, { Then I will be a happy Chic.} 6} Visit the Podiatrist { Just seems like the thing to do, since it's covered under insurance, and a pedicure is not, lol} 7} Camp more 8} Join the Kayak club, { Kayaking every Thursday night, then out to dinner} 9} Do more visiting and hanging out with the family. 10} More boating on the big boat. 11} More Hiking 12} Plant a vegetable garden 13} Work Less |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Wednesday, December 26, 2007
My Thursday Thirteen List
2} Dixie Chix C-D 3} A baby blue Velor sweater 4} A gift basket from my sister Midgie full of things I love, a two sister's angel candle holder,X-mas mailbox, and Beautiful Soap Company supplies. 5} An L&B 4 person place setting, wine tote, place mats, & napkins 6} My nephew made me a wooden plaque with my name on it. 7} Rosary Beads from my patient, that have been blessed. 8} Christmas cookies 9} money. green and checks 10} neck massager 11} a large supplie of double A batteries 12} Did I mention cookies,,,,,so many cookies 13} A wind chime Hope every one had a joyous holiday!! And Santa was good to you all. |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Thursday, December 20, 2007
Thirteen Thursday
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Thursday, November 15, 2007
Thirsday's Thirteen List
2} Turn the computor on. 3} Drink a big glass of water or juice. 4} Plug heater in bathroom 5} Get on line 6} Have a cup of coffee or 2 7} Do 25 crunches using my exercize ball 8} Go back to the putor: Check email, post in blog 9} Gather my outfit 10} Jump in shower, do all the am thingies 11} By this time, I am late, find my keys 12} Grab my pocketbook 13} Gtab my cell phone, and out the door I go.....forgetting everything I needed to take with me. |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Thursday, November 08, 2007
MyThirteen Thursday List
2} J awoke today too. 3} I know my whole family is safe. 4} No snow outside yet. 5} I have a job that I like 6} Food in the fridge 7} Heat in the house 8} The doggy made it down the stairs in the dark with out falling. 9} The truck Will start { positive thinking} 10} I realized my PO Master has been messing up my checks for a long time. 11} My clothes are all planned for the day. 12} The alarm clock worked! 13} I will have cell service all day { another positive thinking} Happy Thirteen Thursday All!! |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Thirteen Thursday
2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. 3.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them. 4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. 5.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. 6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me 7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. 9.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. 10.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.
12.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere! 13..They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken. And a couple extra to make it a Great TT! ..He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD. ..Ham and eggs.A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig. . { Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends! |
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Thursday, October 25, 2007
My Thursday Thirteen List
1} Blogging...{Posting,Surfing,Memes,} 2} Traveling.....{Car,boat,Bus, Or Train} 3} Camping....{ By Ocean, Lake, River } 4} Going to the Gym.....{Using the Cross ramp} 5} Biking....{ Flat Surfaces...LOL} 6} Hiking....{ Woods, Rugged Terrain} 7} Boating...{ On our Big boat Or a Cruise} 8} Kayaking and Canoeing...{ Anywhere} 9}Reading......{Novels,Suspense,Fiction,Fact} 10} Movies....{ Theater, DVDs} 11} Swimming...{ Pool, River, Lake, Ocean} 12} Cooking....{Gourmet, Trying New recipes} 13} Shopping...{ Clothes, Antiques, Food} My list can actually go longer, I also like to do Gardening, Crafts, Woodworking, Crocheting, Knitting: The only thing is work and family occupies most of my time. |
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Thursday, October 18, 2007
Helena 2} Work-Postal, Homecare, My Tech gig 3} Putor time, and actually not enough, I haven't reported any buzz to my buzz agent Juno. Or completed any survies from Synovate. 4} Writing on a dry board, communicating with patient. 5} cooking for patient and my self. 6} Laundry 7} Picture taking ( Digetal) 8} Picture taking ( With a old 35mm) 9} Down loading pictures, and deleating some ;>) 10} Visiting 2 nursing homes, trying to find a good place for my Mom. 11} talking on the phone ( which I seem to hate more and more as I get older.) 12} Trying to figure out what to for the rest of my life. 13) Exercising....( Which is a plus) |
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!
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, we're going to have company. 
